The internet has come to the defense of an “exhausted” new mother who got into an argument with her husband and in-laws over a macaroni dinner she prepared on Monday.
Writing in Reddit’s “Am I The A**hole” (AITA) forum under the username u/Dinner101____, the woman asked: “AITA for serving my husband’s family mac n cheese for dinner?” The post has amassed more than 17,000 upvotes and over 3,000 comments from upset Redditors, many of whom argued the new mother shouldn’t have been forced to cook at all.
In her post, the woman explained that she gave birth to her first child only four weeks ago.
“The baby is healthy (thank God) but I’m exhausted, haven’t fixed my hair, barely able to shower and cannot sleep,” she wrote.
The woman went on to say that her in-laws have been asking to meet the baby, but she’s been pushing them off because she’s not “ready for visitors.” On Monday, however, her husband invited his parents over for dinner without warning.
“I asked my husband if we should order take out for dinner,” she recalled. He said ‘NO’ because his parents would find this rude and unwelcoming. He suggested that I go inside the kitchen and prepare something, anything [as] long as it’s ‘homemade.'”
So, she decided on macaroni and cheese because it’s easy to make. But this upset her in-laws, particularly her mother-in-law.
“She went on a rant about how disrespectful this was and that I clearly have no experience in what is right and wrong when it comes to hosting,” the woman said.
“We had an argument and they decided to go home,” she continued.
According to food writer Josh Friedland, it’s “impolite” for dinner guests to “reject” their host’s food.
“When you accept an invitation to dinner, you are engaging in a social contract to eat the food that is being served. Even if you can’t stomach your host’s meatloaf, it would be impolite to outright reject what’s on the table. ‘t mean there aren’t some loopholes that allow you to maintain polite relations with your host,” he told the Chicago Tribune.
“In this age of dietary restrictions, food allergies, fad diets and politically guided eating, there is no shortage of excuses for politely declining your food. You could, of course, say you are gluten-free, a vegetarian or on the Atkins diet ,” he offered.
Unfortunately, the woman’s husband didn’t confront his parents over their poor etiquette. Instead, he also blasted his wife for serving macaroni and cheese, saying the meal was “more offensive than serving them nothing at all.”
Now, her husband is giving her the cold shoulder and “refuses” to eat anything she cooks “in support of his family.”
Redditors slammed the woman’s husband and in-laws for demanding that she cook for them so soon after giving birth.
“You are NT [not the a**hole] But your husband and his family certainly are. Surprise guests that you are expected to cater to while your husband sits there and instructs you to do it? Hell, no. A MIL who berates you and what you served? H**l, no. His family should have come in bearing gifts and food at a date and time you knew about,” commented u/unionmom4.
Redditor u/Grab_Specialist agreed, saying: “This is very concerning. I’m so sorry. It’s so much bigger than mac and cheese.”
“NTA. You just had a baby, didn’t invite them, weren’t warned that they would be at your home, and STILL managed to cook something for them. They were snobby and ungrateful, and your husband was incredibly inconsiderate every step of the way. Next time let your husband prepare the food if he’s so desperate to see his family and please them,” u/lihzee added.
Newsweek has reached out to u/Dinner101____ for comment.
In related news, a woman went viral in March after sharing that her in-laws threw her a boy-themed baby shower, despite the fact that she’s pregnant with a girl.
Earlier this month, Reddit applauded a woman who told her mother-in-law to go f**k herself following an inappropriate comment. Commenters also backed a mother-to-be who said she didn’t want her in-laws with her in the delivery room.